Forgiveness

There's something about forgiveness that makes you release all the pain and anger you've been holding inside you. If you say that you forgive someone, but you're still holding anger in your heart, then you haven't truly forgiven them, have you? Today I was able to release all the pain and anger that I felt. When I just want someone to be happy, despite how much they hurt me in the past, it eases my mind and makes me feel better.

I talked to my Ex and I asked him why he made me feel like my love didn't matter to him. Whether he meant to treat me that way or not, that is how I felt. We're all human and whether or not we mean to hurt someone, it will happen. When we're truly sorry, we need to be forgiven. If someone is truly sorry for the pain they caused us, then we need to forgive. I can imagine that only a heartless person wouldn't be forgiving. My Ex told me that he wasn't really sure what he was feeling towards me or any one and he was feeling detached. I told him that I forgive him. All I want is for him to be happy, even if it's not with me. I know that I made him very happy, but he didn't know if the way he felt towards me was different than an emotional connection.

Regardless of that, I don't want to form a relationship with him again because of all the other times that he dumped me, only to get back together with me. Every time he dumped me, it hurt more than anything. It's over completely and I'm ready to let go and work on myself.

Even though I forgave him, I told him one thing. I told him that he didn't absolutely have to act that way. None of us are robots programmed to act a certain way. I also said that he should've told me what was going on before all of this blew over. Usually he told me everything under the sun. I can't understand why he felt the need to keep that under wraps.